tarotgal: (My Weakness)
Hi all :-) I've sort of been absorbed in work and in the Strokes 'verse lately. Sorry about the lack of posts. There's still a long work-related sneeze post I've been meaning to write for a LONG time. But I had some other thoughts I wanted to share as well (at end of this post).

First off, OMG I loved Numb3ers last night! Larry's budding romance (FINALLY) was great- I just ADORE Peter and his acting is always so natural and normal... love it. The soap-in-pepper-water trick Charlie used as an analogy had me cheering out loud! I LOVED doing that as a kid!!!!!!! I remember going to my grandparents' house in Michigan (before they moved to CA) and making my mother buy a tin pan just so I could show them that. LOL And the ending scene was just so wonderful: "Big pappa", Don knowing the contents of Charlie's fridge because he's there more, the brotherly thought-exchange and the little bit of fighting.... I sooooooooooo wish I could come up with good crime/mystery plots so that I could write more Numb3rs fics! It's SUCH a fun fandom.

Tuesday- Mom and I were watching the very painful American Idol show (on fast forward). As Chris was singing, Mom made a comment about how Chris would be good at singing Queen songs and that should be the next week. And I laughed and agreed and said they could even have the group on (since they seem to have a famous person on every week now) with the new lead singer to critique the singers. So imagine our surprise when, on the results show on Wednesday, the next theme that was announced was: the songs of Queen!!!! And they showed the contestants jamming with Queen! LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm soooooooo looking forward to seeing what each person picks. I love Queen soooooooooooooo much. It's not the same without Freddie but I'm still excited. Even if they butcher all the songs, I don't care. Soooooooo excited!!

I'm so behind in my TV watching. Still have 3 weeks of LOST and 2 weeks of the OC to catch up on. Gah.

Okay... the sneeze thoughts. So I spent several hours yesterday downloading male sneezing video clips and going supery-crazy-happy over the clips, especially the ones of Richard Dean Anderson and David McCallum (OMG OMG OMG SOOOO super-crazy-happy to finally see whumped!Illya sneezing!!!!!!!!). And it made me think about that intense jump and tingle I get when I see a good sneeze. There are times I consider myself asexual to a degree... with the exclusion of my number 1 fetish and a few other smaller fetishes that sometimes get to me. I hate admitting I'm so dependant on the fetish but I think I am to an extent. I mean, I enjoy sex without it and like sex without it. But it doesn't give me that rush the way sex involving sneezing or sex involving sneezing fantasies does. So it got me thinking... do normal people have that sort of rush just by looking at someone sexy/good-looking? Because I might find someone attractive and want him... but it's only my fetish that really gets me going in the sort of way I expect normal people just by doing normal things. I don't know where I'm going with this, really, but it's sort of strengthened the point that I've no way to compare myself to others cuz there's no way for me to feel how they feel and I might as well just enjoy what I enjoy.

I've also pretty much always been such a big fan of pre-sneeze moments more than any other. I go crazy for long build-ups. Maybe it's the cartoons from my childhood, I don't know, but I just adore watching the beginnings of a sneeze. The facial expressions as the sneeze comes over a guy, the realization, the sound of a build-up, any actions relating to it (covering nose, scrambling for/readying a handkerchief, etc.)... a warning given... that "just about to sneeze" look when the sneeze has taken hold and is in total control of a person... that "can't turn back now" moment... gods it gets me good! It's always been my favorite. I love the anticipation I have that contributes to my rush at the sight/sound of that part of a sneeze.
But I am also very fond of the release. Build-ups without release don't really thrill me. I love the variety of sounds and types and the complete helplessness that comes with the controlling sneeze.

As I've been watching so many clips over the last day (I'm on dial-up- lots of time to watching clips repeatedly while downloading others!) I've noticed my sudden interest in the after moments as well. The way guys pull back... or the sound of a gentle breath or sniffle upon recovery from a sneeze... or the move to get a tissue they hadn't had before... or a groan of realization about a cold they now know is coming on... a mumbled excuse me or the facial expression as he gets blessed by someone. I'm finding myself watching the after moments, just as attracted to them as the other parts. Not to say I didn't like them before, because I definitely did. But lately I like the after parts just as much as the sneeze itself.

And I think it's because SO much of my attraction has to do with context. A sneeze is fine on its own, but it doesn't get to me the same way one does if I see all the stages and know why the person is sneezing. On a fantasy level, I usually can't... well, reach my happy place, without a full situation to go along with sneezes themselves. I'm blushing to admit some of my favorite stories I've written have been born out of images/situations imagined while I was... you know. But most of my fantasies stay exclusively in my head as my very own. I think the reason I've always written sneezefic fanfic (waaaay before I knew either of those terms) was because I wanted to see characters I loved in these full situations. What makes them sneeze, how they feel about it, what happens to them because of it, etc. is just as attractive to me as the fact that they are sneezing in the first place. It's like how people might see a beautiful person and want to see him/her naked, I see a beautiful character and want to see him sick and sneezing. Anyway, back to my point, is I think I'm now digging the after sneeze portion so much because I like seeing the complete picture, the complete sneezing experience. And all the variation afterwards is, to me now, just as fascinating as the before and during.

And, to close, I'd just like to say another OMG sneezing!Illya!!! *VEG* I'm in total Heaven. And I just love how Illya!David and Ducky!David have such completely different sneezes, even though it's the same actor. And I love how Will Smith doesn't cover his nose when sneezing for real in either of the clips (and the pre-sneeze expressions on his face are to die for because they're *real*). And I could go on forever but I'll shuddup now.


Contents of this journal include: sneeze fetish references and lots of hurt/comfort, short fics and/or WIPS, everything from gen and het to slash and femslash, everything from G to NC-17, random ramblings about my life and fandom obsessions.

September 2017

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