Why Do I Do It?

Why do I watch 'Dead Poet's Society'? I am repeatedly taken in by the adorable thoughts of young lads jumbled together in idealism and learning. By the thoughts of quotes about why we read and why we write and how to live. By the gorgeous words and the delicate dialogue. By the separate stuggles for the same thing on so many different paths. By that brilliant yalping moment of inspiration of Todd's when he bursts into life- or when they all have their own bursts of inspiration. And I think how wonderful a movie it is and how much I want to watch it, right before I hit play.

Only to sob when Neil dies... or when Todd breaks down in the snow... or when Nuwanda gets expelled... or when the class salutes. I cry my heart out when Mr.Keating crys at Neil's desk. But when they stand on their desks... it is too much. I want to be a teacher! I want to be a writer! I want to move to Waldon's Pond and walk naked with Whitman. I want to lie Byron and Shelly down on a four poster and have at them. I want to suck out every brilliant word that this world contains. I am drained and weak when the credits begin. And all I can do is cry.

LotR Fic

Oh my goodness... I think I just finished writing it...
I hadn't planned the next step of the story, and I got through the scenes I had planned on.. and then suddenly, it came to an end on its own. It was quite surprising, really.

It needs a LOT of editing and revision... and a final paragraph I think I'm too tired to write tonight without screwing poor Legolas up royally... but with any luck... I'll be posting soon. We shall see... wow... I'm impressed. LOL *pets story lovingly*

Ooohh!

Sneezey dream! Haven't had one of these in a long time. heehee Tis kinda funny (perhaps disapointing) that I acted just the same as I would in real life. It was at the end of my dream, so I won't go into details about the rest, but I was sitting with one of my best friends at a table in some sort of college/school building during morning break between classes. There had been this guy I noticed earlier in the dream. He kept sniffling quite wetly and rubbing thumb and index finger against his nostrils- not his whole nose, just the bottom at the nostrils. Well, he was wallking along with a friend and stopped right next to my table with a really wet sniffle and a sigh. He muttered something to the extent of "This is so immature" but pulled his backback off halfway, swinging it around to his stomach, unzipped and pulled out a tissue from a small wad. Then he raised it to his mouth and nose... he had a rather large nose, actually, for his face, but otherwise he's your typical blond guy in khaki's... and he sneezes harshly, just feel away from me. And what do I do? I look away because I don't want them to see me staring at his sneeze. LOL I don't even look up until he's done blowing his nose and he's moved on down the hallway. LOL I think it's time to get a little bit more brave- at least in my dreams! LOL

Bless You Situation

eowyngreenleaf was talking about blessing people (or not, as the cause usually is) in her LJ a few posts back. I've had similar conversations with others about this topic, and while some people in "the community" even consider it part of their fetish to bless people after they sneeze (like a way of getting involved more intimately in the sneeze), many of us (maybe even most) feel uncomfortable about doing so publically.

I personally will say it to my boyfriend because he knows about my fetish and expects some sort of reaction- but I don't like the sound of those words coming out of my mouth and I usually say something like "you're so sexy" instead. And I'll say it to my best friends just to be nice, and to practice but I actually feel uncomfy most times then... I just don't like to hear it come out of my mouth...

Now, the odd thing is, which I discovered yesterday walking through one building on campus, is that I MENTALLY bless people. I hear a sneeze, like, twenty feet away and I say 'bless you!' in my head very enthusiastically. The sentiment just doesn't translate outward... and sometimes I think it with lots of excitement, sometimes sing-song-like. I just don't say it out loud. Now, that is weird!