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tarotgalBaaaad night. Fell asleep from about 8-10:45- woke up a couple times to see Stargate at 10 (was the episode where Jonas has a tumor... I've only seen most of the Jonas episodes once or twice at the most so it was nice to see again how that ep finally ends). But, yeah, woke up feeling hungry and sick. That sort of sick you get when you're more than hungry, you know?
Boyfriend called, we talked a little, we went downtown to have dinner at midnight. I wanted to pay but he insisted. But when we got there, the diner was closed. It's supposed to be open until 3am on Sunday nights. GRRR! SO now I'm sick and starving and there's nothing in my damn apartment I can eat (everything's got dairy... I can't handle dairy right now).
Anyway, this is my last week living here. And last week with boyfriend. And when he asked for sex (second time today) and I told him (for the second time) I wasn't sure so maybe, he was like "Well, maybe I'll just go away on vacation this week if you're going to be too busy for me." And I explained that it wasn't because I was busy but because it's hard to have sex with someone you know wants to break up with you in 8 days, he got VERY silent and didn't talk the whole rest of the trip. I asked him where he was thinking of going if he went on vacation and what he'd do about his dad who's supposed to be stopping in to stay with him Wed and he didn't have much of an answer for me. I think I hurt him. Which is a bad thing to do because I DO care about him and we ARE technically still dating. I had wanted to spend the week with him because he's my best friend really, but if he would rather go away for the whole week on vacation just because he's not getting any from me I guess that just goes to prove again how little he actually feels for me and our relationship. I just wrote him an e-mail explaining... I talk so much better in writing :-) I love that delete key. Wish there was a backspace key when talking! Plus he's watching LotR as he taped it earlier tonight and I don't want to interrupt that :-)
Anyway... so just spent the last hour crying. Gah. My family's going through a really hard time as well. Sister is not doing well. And I'm SO worried about her and the rest of my family that I feel damn guilty for crying about my own problems. But I think I'll feel better about living with them now so I can keep an eye on my sister now. I just... I just don't need the problems of moving and thesis and this boyfriend shite on top of my family problems right now. I just don't. There's only so much I can handle at one time and actually still be productive and manage to pack and clean and sleep and work. ANd I'm out of food. GODS I'm hungry. There's nothing in this apartment to eat and I'm too sick to go drive... not that I have the money to buy food anyway. Gah... life sucks. LOL
Okay, sorry to bitch. It's just been one of those nights. *sigh*
Boyfriend called, we talked a little, we went downtown to have dinner at midnight. I wanted to pay but he insisted. But when we got there, the diner was closed. It's supposed to be open until 3am on Sunday nights. GRRR! SO now I'm sick and starving and there's nothing in my damn apartment I can eat (everything's got dairy... I can't handle dairy right now).
Anyway, this is my last week living here. And last week with boyfriend. And when he asked for sex (second time today) and I told him (for the second time) I wasn't sure so maybe, he was like "Well, maybe I'll just go away on vacation this week if you're going to be too busy for me." And I explained that it wasn't because I was busy but because it's hard to have sex with someone you know wants to break up with you in 8 days, he got VERY silent and didn't talk the whole rest of the trip. I asked him where he was thinking of going if he went on vacation and what he'd do about his dad who's supposed to be stopping in to stay with him Wed and he didn't have much of an answer for me. I think I hurt him. Which is a bad thing to do because I DO care about him and we ARE technically still dating. I had wanted to spend the week with him because he's my best friend really, but if he would rather go away for the whole week on vacation just because he's not getting any from me I guess that just goes to prove again how little he actually feels for me and our relationship. I just wrote him an e-mail explaining... I talk so much better in writing :-) I love that delete key. Wish there was a backspace key when talking! Plus he's watching LotR as he taped it earlier tonight and I don't want to interrupt that :-)
Anyway... so just spent the last hour crying. Gah. My family's going through a really hard time as well. Sister is not doing well. And I'm SO worried about her and the rest of my family that I feel damn guilty for crying about my own problems. But I think I'll feel better about living with them now so I can keep an eye on my sister now. I just... I just don't need the problems of moving and thesis and this boyfriend shite on top of my family problems right now. I just don't. There's only so much I can handle at one time and actually still be productive and manage to pack and clean and sleep and work. ANd I'm out of food. GODS I'm hungry. There's nothing in this apartment to eat and I'm too sick to go drive... not that I have the money to buy food anyway. Gah... life sucks. LOL
Okay, sorry to bitch. It's just been one of those nights. *sigh*
