Awfulness and joy! But mostly awfulness.
Oct. 30th, 2018 09:37 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tarotgalI've had a lot of good news lately--a certain friend is buying a home for the first time, I got a raise that kicks in mid-November which should be able to offset any overages from my solar panel payments (awesome that my bill from the power company was so low this month though!), I'm going to get to spend a month writing things I'm super excited about, my workout schedule is getting easier and easier to stick to (I'm hoping for another perfect month), I'm ahead of my own schedule on 101 things, we FINALLY got internet in our office installed last week and I set it up yesterday morning on all our desktops, I got three adorable (small) new-to-me stuffed animals I ordered (one owl for my special Beanie Boo owl collection and two tiny pound puppies), I LOVE Halloween, I had a great time at Saturday's NaNoWriMo kickoff party and came home with my favorite tea in a Marauder's Map mug, and my mother's surgery went well (pre-breast cancer, caught and removed super early, and she's recovering so well).
But there's also a lot of drama right now at work, which I could certainly live without. And my parents' dog had to be put to sleep yesterday. It's strange how it doesn't matter how many good things I have going on, one thing like losing a pet will make everything feel awful and joyless. Poor Finlay was diagnosed with cancer within 2 weeks of my parents adopting him, so it's not like it was a surprise. He had a different kind of cancer before they adopted him, which he beat. But a new kind hit him. He hung around for about 4 years, and we've only had him since spring of 2015. Definitely not enough time to spend with the little guy. We're all super sad about the loss. Cancer is stupid. I am not a fan. I miss the puppy.
V-ing trigger warning regarding cats not people to follow:
Charlie cat has been getting sick to her stomach when she eats too fast or eats too much. It's happened three days in a row now. Grrr. But this is something she does. I should probably look into a slowdown bowl for her. Ozma started getting sick yesterday. She got sick no fewer than 10 times throughout the day (thought it might be just a morning thing, but it was all day). Around 11pm, she threw up a little metal thing attached to a string. I've NO IDEA where it came from. I've checked all my plushies, ceiling light pulls, window blinds, and looked around for anything else out of place. Nothing. No idea what it is or if it's part of something else still in her. She was sick again this morning, but she was fine the rest of the day. And last night she was racing around the house playing with mice and rolling around on her back playing with Charlie. And she's been super hungry the whole time. So maybe that's all it was--something she ate that's no longer in her system? I don't know, but I was SO sick with worry last night. And sad. I fell asleep in bed with BOTH cats snuggling next to me, which has NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE. Ozma crawled under the covers with me in bed, which has only ever happened once before. I think she knew I was sad about Finlay and worried, and she probably wanted some comfort, too. But she's kept everything down the whole rest of the day today, about 16 hours now or more. So I am hoping that's all it was and the worst is behind us. She scared me so much!
I'm also incredibly saddened by the recent shooting. Every time I think I'll be desensitized to this sort of thing, because mass shootings seem to happen more and more these days, I'm reminded that I'm not. Each one is uniquely awful. Places of worship, like schools and hospitals, are supposed to be safe spaces. This violation of that hits me hard, and I keep reading the bios about the people who were lost and losing composure all over again.
But there's also a lot of drama right now at work, which I could certainly live without. And my parents' dog had to be put to sleep yesterday. It's strange how it doesn't matter how many good things I have going on, one thing like losing a pet will make everything feel awful and joyless. Poor Finlay was diagnosed with cancer within 2 weeks of my parents adopting him, so it's not like it was a surprise. He had a different kind of cancer before they adopted him, which he beat. But a new kind hit him. He hung around for about 4 years, and we've only had him since spring of 2015. Definitely not enough time to spend with the little guy. We're all super sad about the loss. Cancer is stupid. I am not a fan. I miss the puppy.
V-ing trigger warning regarding cats not people to follow:
Charlie cat has been getting sick to her stomach when she eats too fast or eats too much. It's happened three days in a row now. Grrr. But this is something she does. I should probably look into a slowdown bowl for her. Ozma started getting sick yesterday. She got sick no fewer than 10 times throughout the day (thought it might be just a morning thing, but it was all day). Around 11pm, she threw up a little metal thing attached to a string. I've NO IDEA where it came from. I've checked all my plushies, ceiling light pulls, window blinds, and looked around for anything else out of place. Nothing. No idea what it is or if it's part of something else still in her. She was sick again this morning, but she was fine the rest of the day. And last night she was racing around the house playing with mice and rolling around on her back playing with Charlie. And she's been super hungry the whole time. So maybe that's all it was--something she ate that's no longer in her system? I don't know, but I was SO sick with worry last night. And sad. I fell asleep in bed with BOTH cats snuggling next to me, which has NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE. Ozma crawled under the covers with me in bed, which has only ever happened once before. I think she knew I was sad about Finlay and worried, and she probably wanted some comfort, too. But she's kept everything down the whole rest of the day today, about 16 hours now or more. So I am hoping that's all it was and the worst is behind us. She scared me so much!
I'm also incredibly saddened by the recent shooting. Every time I think I'll be desensitized to this sort of thing, because mass shootings seem to happen more and more these days, I'm reminded that I'm not. Each one is uniquely awful. Places of worship, like schools and hospitals, are supposed to be safe spaces. This violation of that hits me hard, and I keep reading the bios about the people who were lost and losing composure all over again.
