Marriage Protection Week
Oct. 9th, 2003 11:27 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tarotgalI haven't bothered before to rant about this Marriage Protection Week absurdity... because it's just flat-out the stupidest thing I have heard in a LONG while and I wouldn't have the faintest idea where to start with it. I just sit open-mouthed at the stupidity and wrongness of it all. Not to mention it coinsiding with the 5-year anniversary of Matthew Shepherd's murder!!! *hits head against the wall*
But I was just checking the dates on the main MPW website and came across this Q&A about why letting gay people marry is "wrong" And... I just cannot find the words to speak about that kind of thing. It's insane that so many people in this day and age feel like this. I just.... ARG!!!!!!!! I'm so frustrated with all of this. I honestly don't understand why there is such need to deny loving people from doing something like getting married. All of this 'they can visit in hospitals and share property already' business is even more confusing. All right, if you don't have a problem with them having those rights, why is being considered a couple legally such a problem if they're going to act it anyway? ARG! Love is love, and this is doing NOTHING to keep marriage a "loving institution". It's just causing more friction and hate where it doesn't have to me (and shouldn't be, IMHO)
I just... AHHH!!!! The timing and Bush and AHHH! I'm SO beyond frustrated right now. I'm stunned and sickened. And I wish my neighbor would turn down his stereo. I am tired of banging on the wall. It's midnight. Come ON now. Does NO ONE have common sense nowadays? I don't even want to get into the California election *rolls eyes*
But I was just checking the dates on the main MPW website and came across this Q&A about why letting gay people marry is "wrong" And... I just cannot find the words to speak about that kind of thing. It's insane that so many people in this day and age feel like this. I just.... ARG!!!!!!!! I'm so frustrated with all of this. I honestly don't understand why there is such need to deny loving people from doing something like getting married. All of this 'they can visit in hospitals and share property already' business is even more confusing. All right, if you don't have a problem with them having those rights, why is being considered a couple legally such a problem if they're going to act it anyway? ARG! Love is love, and this is doing NOTHING to keep marriage a "loving institution". It's just causing more friction and hate where it doesn't have to me (and shouldn't be, IMHO)
I just... AHHH!!!! The timing and Bush and AHHH! I'm SO beyond frustrated right now. I'm stunned and sickened. And I wish my neighbor would turn down his stereo. I am tired of banging on the wall. It's midnight. Come ON now. Does NO ONE have common sense nowadays? I don't even want to get into the California election *rolls eyes*
Gahhhh!
Date: 2003-10-10 04:29 am (UTC)I know how you feel. I've grown up among one of the largest gay communities in the world, so i can completely relate to how you feel. It's so absurd that so many people feel this way, but I suppose you have to look at the enviornment that they were raised in. I'm just glad that i was raised in a tolerant society that teaches us the values of judging people on who they are, not who they love. Love is love right? I just wish that tolerance would spread faster, albeit it's not helping that a closed minded monkey is in the whitehouse. And god damnnit, don't even get me started on the idiot that's now running my state. I'm ashamed, so damn ashamed to live here. Hmm. I hear Canada is nice this time of year..i wonder how much the real estate is... Where is our country going? We have Bush in the white house, Jesse Ventura...hah! And now the governator! What's next? Lassie on the supreme court? Haha i get a kick out of politics.
Re: Gahhhh!
Date: 2003-10-10 04:43 am (UTC)And honestly, I think I'd feel MUCH better about Lassie being in charge than a republican... let alone a republican actor who wants to get rid of the car tax. My state (Virginia) elected its last (not current) governor SPECIFICALLY on the car tax issue and the state went to HELL because of it. We're still trying to pick up the pieces. There's no money for anything now- especially education thanks to those idiots who didn't want to extra pay taxes on their cars. I DON'T understand how people think they can lower tazes and provide more services to the public at the same time. I'm sorry, but that's not logical at all.
I definitely count myself lucky that I grew up with such liberal parents, even if the rest of society around me was as conservative as you get (and living 30 minutes away from DC didn't help that back then). And while I read a lot from "the other side" and I sort of understand why they feel threatened-especially for those who are religious- I honestly don't understand most of their arguments. You said it perfectly- Love is love. And human rights are human rights. I just don't understand how more love is a bad thing. *sniffles* As stupid as it sounds, I guess I'm just one of those people who wants everyone in the world to hold hands and sing and be happy, as much as I know that will never happen.
oops
Date: 2003-10-10 04:29 am (UTC)~Annalisa *G*
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Date: 2003-10-10 04:44 am (UTC)I fail to see how the capability of producing a child in the past or future should be a qualifier and the main purpose and definition of marriage, in this day and age, when there are so very many children all over the world who are abandoned, unloved, hidden away in orphanages, and passed from one foster home to the next. Loving, committed homosexual couples are the perfect people to provide stable homes for many of these children. Plus, they've basically implied that infertile couples' relationships are less vaild and meaningful than those couples breeding like rabbits.
Their contrasting of homosexual marriage and it's comparison to the prior bans on interracial marriage totally missed the mark too. Their whole defense seems to be that while preserving racial purity was an unworthy goal, limiting marriage to heterosexuals is a 'worthy goal'. What they totally failed to mention was that back in the height of segregation, people believed just as strongly that racial purity *was* a worthy goal. Definitions of 'worthy' are flexible and change with the times...their analogy is the one that is invalid. They just want to pretend that they're not discriminating, and they'll make up any excuse to support that.
Finally, they flat-out dismiss the possiblity that a large number of gay couples actually are monogamous and in more stable relationships than a great deal of heterosexuals. Generalizations like this are dead wrong, a flat-out falsehood. No respected journalist would be allowed to get away with lies like this, but if it's in the name of 'religion and family', we're supposed to buy it without question...uh,huh...I don't think so.
I can't stand articles like this. They take dogma and state it as fact...they assume that their sweeping statements should be accepted as truth, but they offer nothing to support their claims except their own arrogance and self-righteous attitudes. Unfounded bigotry like this disgusts me.
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Date: 2003-10-10 04:57 am (UTC)How DARE they bring up AIDS?! Apparently they're unaware of the statistics of HIV infection in Africa, where infection rates are many, MANY times higher than in the US, and upwards of 99% of those infected are HETEROsexual. Try again, author-bigot...you're just regurgitating stereotypes again and again...check your facts before you open your mouth and reveal your ignorance! You warthog-faced buffoon! (sorry, couldn't resist that last little quote!)
*rant over*
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Date: 2003-10-10 05:07 am (UTC)I was just trying to find an article I read last week about that... can't find it right now, but I'll keep looking. It tries (badly, IMHO) to link the recent rise of AIDS in the gay community with the rise of rights granted to gays in the country. So it kept explaining that if we deny them the right to marry, and have parades, etc. then there could be a decrease in the sense of their community and less muder/abuse from them and less spread of disease because there would be less of them together in one place. I was literally crying with anger over that one.
And the AIDS problem in Africa- well, that alone makes me cry, actually. It literally touches everyone there in one way or another. And has nothing at all to do with sexual preferences. When we say we need more education about the spread of AIDS world-wide, I think that's GOT to include trying to touch people like the one who wrote this article.
warthog-faced buffoon
LMAO! I just used that insult the other day, actually :-)
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Date: 2003-10-10 04:57 am (UTC)I could find faults with literally every single one of their arguments... ESPECIALLY as the sister of an adopted child who has met a lot of caring same-sex parents at our agency get-togethers who provide such loving homes...
Plus, they've basically implied that infertile couples' relationships are less vaild and meaningful than those couples breeding like rabbits.
Ug. Like half my relatives who are Catholics and don't use birth control and can BARELY afford to support their huge families and certainly can't afford to give them college educations or help them out financially after they graduate from home schooling and are kicked out on their own. Yeah. Like that's a great situation?
I especially laughed at the part where they said that couples' birth controls could fail or they could get a surprise and have a child and that would justify them as a couple.Oh, yeah. That's a fantastic thing. Support accidents and unplanned pregnancies. *bangs head against wall*
I'm just speechless as to how people use anything they can to justify their hatred. It's just not right. Of COURSE not all gay people want to be married- and of course some of them are permiscuous. The point is that people should be allowed to love and life the way they want as long as it doesn't hurt others. ANd no matter what they say, gay marriages do NOT hurt the economy or the culture or anything like that. But so are thousands of straight people. And as a straight woman who doesn't ever want to be married, I don't feel threatened in the least by those that do. I just...arg. Really. I'm beyond words by this whole political movement. A loving family can be so much more than these close-minded people are willing to see.
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Date: 2003-10-10 05:11 am (UTC)I've found that the first and third options are most satisfying. I swear, there's nothing, and I do mean NOTHING, as pleasing as walking through the mall holding my girlfriend's hand, or kissing her goodbye at the airport. It may sound like I'm an exhibitionist, but I'm really not. I just love her, with all my heart and soul. And I find no harm in showing other people that. And laughing at it just proves that hey, I don't care what they say. So what if it isn't 'right'? It feels DAMN good to let other people know that you're in love by saying vows and exchanging rings. Even if it is just by yourselves, in the bedroom.
I don't understand what people have against homosexuality. My mother, when I first came out to her, thought that it was just a fad I was following. ((I think she believed, though, me when she caught me and girlfriend necking on the couch. LOL)) And I really REALLY don't see what's wrong with homosexual marriages. We're just the same as straight people in the sense that, yes we do want to get married. We want the little house on the corner with the picket fence. We want to have children, and raise them, and kiss their skinned knees. I can't wait to cry the day that my firstborn goes off to kindergarten.
I just got engaged to my girlfriend of eleven months. I asked her at two-thirty in the morning over AIM. And I cried the first time she called me her fiancee. And I can't wait to plan our wedding.
Wrong. Bah. They're just jealous because our love always seems so much greater than theirs.
Sorry for the LONG reply. :)
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Date: 2003-10-10 05:36 am (UTC)*warm hugs* MANY congrats about your engagement! That's so fantastic!!!
I honestly can see myself never marrying. I have no desire to do so(even though I've had the same boyfriend for 3 years now). I can't manage to take care of my house plants and bills right now, let alone a household and a husband. I have never liked the whole formal ceremony thing for myself as I've never really understood why anyone who knows me would care if I signed a piece of paper making my relationship legal. They would just care that I was with someone I love. Then again, I've never been one for legality, anyway. The government has no right to know about my personal life. But of COURSE that doesn't mean I don't support the right of it for others! Everyone should have the right to love who they want (though, um, I do draw the exception when it comes to underage circumstances)
Though as far as kids... I think I'd have to be married before having kids. Just to make it, er, easier on them. Then again, I never want to give birth and most adoption agencies want legally married couples nowadays so there's that decision for me anyway. I love your imagery there... awwwwwww! Makes me SO want a kid when you put it that way! But, erm, not until I manage about a dozen other things like, er, a husband and house and job. *goes and takes her birth control*
As for being an exhibitionist, that didn't cross my mind. :-) I know a lot of gay couples who are quite open about their relationships. And honestly on average, they seem to have much more respect for the public as far as public displays of affection than many of the straight couples I know and witness on a daily basis *shudder* (with the exception of all my married friends who seem rather asexual in public...) I think I have very odd friends now that I think about it on these terms, probably not a good representation of things. Point is, I see nothing wrong with showing others- whether with a kiss or a ceremony- that two people love each other. And more power to you for wanting to share that publically!!!
As far as the article goes I think I D)Just shake my head and feel sad that people like this exist and feel the need to speak out on such matters.
And congrats again!!! :-)
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Date: 2003-10-10 08:16 pm (UTC)The funny thing is, I didn't think I would ever marry either. But being with her, even if it's just talking over the internet ((as she lives in Ottawa at the moment. Yarg)) makes me happier than I've ever been in my life. I can't manage to take care of things like that either, but I'll learn if that's what she wants. And I, personally, don't care about the piece of paper. I would be happy signing a commitment certificate scrawled on a dinner napkin, so long as I sign it with her. I don't know what we both mean when we say get married. If it's going to be in a church ((HIGHLY doubtful)) or in our living room, or on the beach at sunset ((which is what I'm pushing for heh. Can't beat barefoot weddings))
When it comes to kids, I do think it's best to be married beforehand. And I realize that a same-sex couple raising a child is going to be more difficult than a straight couple, I think that it's something that everyone has the right to do. If they want a family, let them have their family. Nobody has any right to say that you won't raise a baby 'properly' just because you're gay. NOBODY.
It's funny, but you're exactly right when it comes to gay couples respecting the public more. Because we do. We know that at any moment, someone could just... take it away from us. Using QAF as an example. Straight couples know that people don't look at them and think 'Oh my god, that is so wrong' and so, they don't feel they have any need to hide. Some of them really should. I remember on Venessa's last trip here, we went to the mall downtown, and while we were walking, she grabbed my hand and dragged me through a store, looking at gowns.
CongratS!
Date: 2003-10-10 06:04 am (UTC)Re: CongratS!
Date: 2003-10-10 08:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-10-11 08:24 pm (UTC)I think that people are stupid if they compare a homosexual that has HIV/AIDS, or is permiscuous, or has inappropriate relationships with a minor to a hetrosexual couple married 25 years or more. That is Stupid, Wrong and Unfair. It'd be like saying that Hetrosexual relationships are wrong and bad and evil because there are those that are permiscous, have HIV/AIDS, and have inappropriate relationships with children. Besides... what are the percentages of s.o. abuse?
I sooo agree in regards to elevating marriages with children. I can't Tell you how many people harrassed my husb. and I prior to and during our first years of marriage because he didn't want kids and I wasn't sure. *later I changed my mind- and he decided that it was alright, but that was Our choice* I know a few Wonderful couples that chose not to have children and are more loving and giving to the community and the children that surround them then many parents that I know that only take care of their own children and could care less about the community and world in which they live.
I think that the basis of a good relationship and one that I think truly Honours the spirit of marriage and commitment does not depend on the race, religions, or sexuality of the members of the couple. It depends on the couple themselves and their willingness to give of themselves, to sacrifice for each other, to weather the storms together, and to love each other even when they don't like each other
at the moment.
*whew* am done ranting.
Congrats to all couples that honour their commitments to each other.
tma