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tarotgalThis is WAY too funny. I grew up on Abbott and Costello (and BBC comedy, but that's beside the point) and I find this to be hilarious and wanted to share.
Who's on First - Humor
If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, "Who's on First?" might have turned out something like this:
COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT
ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.
ABBOTT: Your computer?
COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.
ABBOTT: What about Windows?
COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?
ABBOTT: Wallpaper.
COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.
ABBOTT: Software for Windows?
COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?
ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
ABBOTT: I just did.
COSTELLO: You just did what?
ABBOTT: Recommend something.
COSTELLO: You recommended something?
ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: For my office?
ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!
ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.
COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?
ABBOTT: Word.
COSTELLO: What word?
ABBOTT: Word in Office.
COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.
ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?
ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W".
COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "W" if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?
ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.
COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?
ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.
OSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?
ABBOTT: One copy.
COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?
ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.
COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?
ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!
(A few days later)
ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?
ABBOTT: Click on "START".............
Just FYI, the move is going all right. Should have internet in a day or two (I'm picking up a new cable tonight on the way home from work). We moved all five cats over last night- they were NOT happy. My boy was the first brave one to venture out of his cage and the first one to come in through the cat door (they're all indoor cats) that my parents put in the wall from the hallway on the main floor to the sairs leading down into the basement (so the cats can go up and down without going through the kitchen where the dog lives). Benji was stressed (panting, eyes dripping) and slinked around one room for an hour, Angel growled and was overly affectionate at the same time, Max ran around "Mew?"ing constantly, Sugar just looked around but stayed mostly in the basement, and Butterscotch found somewhere to hide completely and wouldn't come out even at moist food time. They all seemed pretty jumpy this morning, still (except Butters, who was still hiding) and none of them slept with me downstairs, though Sugar did her usual "knock things off Kate's desk" routine at 4:30am (incidentally, allowing me to wake up and watch a little of Angel... Cordelia's Bday episode... with one-armed Wes and Angel doing his nummy 'I'm crazy' curling up on himself routine *swoons*). Gods I LOVE having cable in my room again! Tossed and turned all night... going to have to get used to my old bed and old blankets and sheets again. And I have MASSIVE amounts to unpack and still quite a few loads to take from the old house still. But the move over so far has been all right. ANd the cats will be okay.
Who's on First - Humor
If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, "Who's on First?" might have turned out something like this:
COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT
ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.
ABBOTT: Your computer?
COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.
ABBOTT: What about Windows?
COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?
ABBOTT: Wallpaper.
COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.
ABBOTT: Software for Windows?
COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?
ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
ABBOTT: I just did.
COSTELLO: You just did what?
ABBOTT: Recommend something.
COSTELLO: You recommended something?
ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: For my office?
ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!
ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.
COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?
ABBOTT: Word.
COSTELLO: What word?
ABBOTT: Word in Office.
COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.
ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?
ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W".
COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "W" if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?
ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.
COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?
ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.
OSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?
ABBOTT: One copy.
COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?
ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.
COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?
ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!
(A few days later)
ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?
ABBOTT: Click on "START".............
Just FYI, the move is going all right. Should have internet in a day or two (I'm picking up a new cable tonight on the way home from work). We moved all five cats over last night- they were NOT happy. My boy was the first brave one to venture out of his cage and the first one to come in through the cat door (they're all indoor cats) that my parents put in the wall from the hallway on the main floor to the sairs leading down into the basement (so the cats can go up and down without going through the kitchen where the dog lives). Benji was stressed (panting, eyes dripping) and slinked around one room for an hour, Angel growled and was overly affectionate at the same time, Max ran around "Mew?"ing constantly, Sugar just looked around but stayed mostly in the basement, and Butterscotch found somewhere to hide completely and wouldn't come out even at moist food time. They all seemed pretty jumpy this morning, still (except Butters, who was still hiding) and none of them slept with me downstairs, though Sugar did her usual "knock things off Kate's desk" routine at 4:30am (incidentally, allowing me to wake up and watch a little of Angel... Cordelia's Bday episode... with one-armed Wes and Angel doing his nummy 'I'm crazy' curling up on himself routine *swoons*). Gods I LOVE having cable in my room again! Tossed and turned all night... going to have to get used to my old bed and old blankets and sheets again. And I have MASSIVE amounts to unpack and still quite a few loads to take from the old house still. But the move over so far has been all right. ANd the cats will be okay.
